But I always loved horses and my mother did too and so I was always known as the "horse crazy girl" and it was pretty much all I ever wanted to talk about to anyone. The first bank account I ever opened was to save money for my first horse. It was all pretty ironic though because my over-zealousness actually was my downfall in that for a large portion of my life no equine even wanted to get near me. Every time I caught sight of a horse every piece of my humanity just kind of divulged into a conniption fit of wiggling and fussing and climbing as far into a stall or over a fence as I could in hopes of petting, well, anything.
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| "Oh God it's her she's back again!" source credit |
As I got older I had about 800,000 (give or take) things I wanted to do with my life. I was going to be a farmer. I was going to be a zoologist. I was going to be a Marine biologist, and then a large animal vet, and then a Agriculture major and then a Shark Biologist. No lies, when I graduated high school I desperately had my heart set on being a shark biologist for the Newport Aquarium and had all my summer volunteer paper work filled out.
When it came time to go to college I started working at the wildlife refuge and realized that this was where I really, REALLY wanted to work. I had no scholarships and wasn't ready to go away from home and so I decided to start out small and work my life out at community college before transferring to UofL for the 2012 august semester. As I got to having my own life independent from school and started doing big grown up things I thought more about my future and the job I was pursuing and decided a degree in Biology was exactly what I needed. I loved reading biology texts for fun and was really enamored in dreams of a big science degree hanging up on my wall.
"So tell me miss Robinson what do you do?"
"I'm a scientist."
Oh yes I was going to be a scientist. Except I started remembering how much I hate math. How I was a year behind in school from failing two math classes and how I still would add on my fingers. But I was good at talking... Like... REALLY good. I could talk velvet all day and educate people and perform and I could pursue a BA In biology and still have that fancy scientific title.
This semester marks the second semester of my third year of college and I still didn't have the three required courses to even apply as a bio major. My Equine minor was sitting pretty on the shelf smiling back at me, happy and sunny and the bio major was like an old lesson nag... Rough, stubborn and slow to progress. I started taking the first chemistry class of the series of six or so necessary for a biology major and suddenly I was overwhelmed. What if I can't do this? Why is something I enjoy such a struggle? What if I get a degree I barely scraped by to end up with? And ever slowly Chemistry was evolving into my second foreign language class.
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When it came time to go to college I started working at the wildlife refuge and realized that this was where I really, REALLY wanted to work. I had no scholarships and wasn't ready to go away from home and so I decided to start out small and work my life out at community college before transferring to UofL for the 2012 august semester. As I got to having my own life independent from school and started doing big grown up things I thought more about my future and the job I was pursuing and decided a degree in Biology was exactly what I needed. I loved reading biology texts for fun and was really enamored in dreams of a big science degree hanging up on my wall.
"So tell me miss Robinson what do you do?"
"I'm a scientist."
Oh yes I was going to be a scientist. Except I started remembering how much I hate math. How I was a year behind in school from failing two math classes and how I still would add on my fingers. But I was good at talking... Like... REALLY good. I could talk velvet all day and educate people and perform and I could pursue a BA In biology and still have that fancy scientific title.
This semester marks the second semester of my third year of college and I still didn't have the three required courses to even apply as a bio major. My Equine minor was sitting pretty on the shelf smiling back at me, happy and sunny and the bio major was like an old lesson nag... Rough, stubborn and slow to progress. I started taking the first chemistry class of the series of six or so necessary for a biology major and suddenly I was overwhelmed. What if I can't do this? Why is something I enjoy such a struggle? What if I get a degree I barely scraped by to end up with? And ever slowly Chemistry was evolving into my second foreign language class.
And finally that was it. I had an epiphany! What the hell was I doing?! This is stupid!! Struggle through your years of college for a degree you want to just to say you have it?! Preposterous! Why would you chose this crap over a degree in horses you big dweeb! I realized I can still minor in Bio and have fun reading my books and enjoying science classes and the study of life without all the hassle of chemistry and the stress of feeling like a failure.
Horses are what I love. They are what I think about almost non stop. What I live, breathe and preach. They are my life's passions, goals and dreams and I couldn't be happier to be a member of this amazing equine family. My decision to change majors came with an overwhelming sea of support and I can say the relief and happiness it has brought me is immense.
Well that's it for my long winded post!! I know first hand what it's like to feel lost or behind or even stranded in college, with no idea where you are heading. I hope if you stuck this story through to the end it provided some enlightenment for you to help you along the way :)
"Not all who wander are lost."
-J.R.R. Tolkien
~Rose
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